OH Jim. I so wanted to come to your show and enjoy it. As you yourself told me in an interview before the show you like to people to come along and have a good time. You want people to disregard the negative press that you have courted for some of your politically incorrect jokes over the years and keep an open mind.
Trouble is, when barely five minutes into your show you say you'd like to punch me and call me the c word, it's always
going to be a tad difficult.
Perhaps it's just me but I always find personal insults a bit of a sticking point to an enjoyable night . Don't get me
wrong I do like a laugh and my friends regularly poke fun at me. But they don't normally hurl abuse in front of hundreds of people.
See Jim didn't take too kindly to an interview we published before the gig. I think the main problem was that I didn't find necrophilia gags and cerebral palsy wisecracks all that funny. And even after you trotted the necrophilia gag a second time round, I remained – unlikely much of the audience – unmoved. Silly me.
And so it was, after Jim had defiantly strode onto the stage in a three-piece pinstripe suit, before turning to the
crowd and joking 'Do you think this will look good in court?' you rounded, for comedy value, on our earlier musings.
What was it you said again Jim? Ahh yes "I would like to thank the local paper, I believe the bloke was from Gloucester or
somewhere for trying his best to make me look a complete a******."
"And if they are in the room doing a review tonight I'd like to meet them and punch them."
Oh I was there. The man you referred to as a '12-year-old spotty oink with a notepad writing everything down' before descending
into a vile obscenity that begins with a c.
And silly me, I was writing everything down you said.
I've got to hand it to you though. You somehow managed to keep the majority of the audience laughing all night as you attempted
to massacre as many sacred cows as you could think of.
Who knew so many people could laugh at comedy gold which involves you making light of deaf people through a series of
It's not to say there weren't genuine moments where you had me laughing. Because a series of topical gags were very funny. But sadly, they were few and far between.
Much of the night was devoted to making light of the 'elephant in the room', sex assault allegations which saw Jim arrested
twice in recent months as part of Operation Yewtree.
And as he did throughout much of our interview, the 59-year-old funnyman turned it all into a big joke.
Of his arrest he said: "I was sitting in the car and he [a policeman] was reading me the riot act and they said look on
the bright side, at least we are not arresting you for underage sex.
"And I said yeah I know, I can't f****** catch those kids."
There was more. At one point Jim turned to the audience and jokingly – because such matters are after all, hilarious - asked
whether he had sexual relations with anyone that had gathered in the crowd.
Laughter ensued before a man jokingly put his hand up. As he shook Jim's hand and returned to his seat, Jim said: "And you wouldn't go telling tales on me would you?"
The Operation Yewtree jokes continued through much of the night in much the same way as Jim made any excuse to berate
a portrait painted in words of himself.
After insulting the paper once again, he joked "This is not helping my write-up is it?"
Truth is Jim, it was an evening once again, you didn't really help yourself.